Well, for those of you who don’t know, I’ve badly broken my foot in two places and will most likely have to have surgery. I have an appointment with the orthopedic surgeon on Monday.
Here is the story of the accident as I wish it would be.
I was riding my motorcycle through Malaysia way too fast in an effort to save a dying child when a puppy ran out in the road. At that moment, I sacrificed my foot by choosing to lay down my bike in order not to kill the puppy. Both the child and the puppy were saved.
Instead, the true story is – I stumped my foot on a piece of furniture in our home office. What is wrong with me? I can’t even walk through the house? Do I see pieces of furniture and think I can defy them?
So here I am with a boot and crutches as the doctor wants no weight on it at all. I get around slowly but mostly I’ve been sitting.
My husband has been awesome about waiting on me and taking care of me, but I am a terrible patient. I’m always so independent and am the one taking care of others. It is extremely difficult for me to ask for and accept help. At a meeting at work yesterday, some of the staff carried things for me, found a foot stool, set things, up, brought my lunch etc. – all without having been asked. I so appreciated it but knew they did it because they know I hate to ask for help. One even said that. Lol I’m stubborn, I guess, but I hate to be needy. Yet here I sit.
I hate to ask for help but just the basics really add up. We don’t realize how much we need or do until we are asking others to do it for us! I mean, a glass of water…oh maybe a snack…oh, my purse, where’s may iPad and earbuds? I need the phone please. Ice pack? Meds? Remote? Extra blanket Feed/Water dog? Let her out? Let her in? Breakfast? Lunch? Dinner? Lotion? Kleenex? Someone’s at the door! And don’t get me started on taking a shower!
I have been sitting here, feeling very sorry for myself, praying for healing and patience, when, with my mind on God, I thought of how helpless we all are when it comes to righteousness and God. I considered how often and for how many things we must depend on Him. I believe God likes for us to remember how helpless we are without Him. For without acknowledgement of my helplessness, I grow arrogant, I look away from our Great Helper, Comforter, and Fortress, and I am drawn toward other affections, ambitions, and pleasures. The world distracts me. It entices me to learn its knowledge, to participate in its amusements, and to use its philosophies to accumulate gain for myself.
When I acknowledge my helplessness and dependence, I also acknowledge my brokenness. Because His Spirit is so much stronger than my brokenness and His grace is so much greater than my sin. I’m not simply broken; I’m forgiven, redeemed, and empowered to represent the God who raised Jesus from the dead.
So today I will choose to be grateful for my broken foot as it is a clear reminder of my continuous helpless dependence on God for every basic need.
“Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.”